


The Saga Of Meteors

by trebleDeath



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Babies, Canon, Cute?, multi chaptered?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-02
Updated: 2014-11-15
Packaged: 2018-02-23 14:09:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2550389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trebleDeath/pseuds/trebleDeath
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A prompt I saw some where, The guardians meet up online to discuss the unlikely event that all of them recieve children who fell from the sky.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> This is pretty damn short. I thought it was longer. But it's short. Will get longer.

Dirk sat down at the computer, having finally gotten the baby asleep. Now he had some free time to figure out why the hell he had a baby.

He opened up a tab and went to google and typed in ‘baby fell from comet in sky’ Unsurprisingly it was an auto complete. BUt it did have some results. Most were useless or yahoo questions made by twelve year olds wanting to know where babies came from. But one link at the top caught his eye. He clicked on it.

It was a forum for lovers of a famous scientist or something. But the page he was lead to was a new post.

**Rolal: guys. so i know this sounds insane, but i got a baby from the sky. no im not drunk. a baby girl fell from the sky. should i do something?????**

Dirk looked at the time it was posted. Barely fifteen minutes ago. Someone receiving a space baby the day after his? That had to be a coincidence. He quickly created an account on the forum, going by his usual DiStri, and replied.

**DiStri: I got a baby too. Not only should we question why the hell babies are falling like its fucking christmas, but also what we should do with them.**

He sat back and waited for a reply. He got one, just not from the original poster.

**Pipefan413: What should you do?? Raise the child I would hope! It may not be your child biologically, but you found it. Should you not take responsibility and raise the poor thing like your flesh and blood?**

**DiStri: Dude. I don’t know what kind of fantastical gentlemanly world you live in, but I live in a one room apartment and I don’t have a lot of cash. I work too much to care for a kid, and if I quit, I won’t work enough to support one. I can barely afford living by myself.**

**#SJB69: If you can’t afford a baby, you shouldn’t have gotten pregnant. God people, think before you have sex.**

**DiStri: Listen here fucker. This god damn baby fell from the sky. And even if you don’t believe that, I didn’t get pregnant. I’m a man, I have a dick. And I didn’t get any one knocked up because I fuck guys nearly exclusively.**

**#SJB69: Well don’t take it out on me you delusional bitch.**

Wow. This guy was an idiot. Just as the blond was about to respond, the baby started crying.

God, that crying was so annoying. He got up and picked the lil shit up. That calmed him down. He sat back down, now with a baby in his lap.

The original poster replied.

**Rolal: yes, thank you for arguing you too. but twelve yr old slap fights dont help me to know what to do with rose!**

**DiStri: You named it?**

**Rolal: yeah its a baby, it needs a name.**

**DiStri: Whatever.**

**#SJB69: Hey, if you are going to talk, PM eachother. Some of us actually want to talk and read about science, not baby names.**

Dirk rolled his eyes. Still, the douche had a point. PMing would be better. He clicked on the message button and sent a simple message to Rolal.

**DiStri: Should I name mine?**

**Rolal: Probs. unless you want it to go through its life nameless.**

**DiStri: True. But I don’t even want a kid.**

**Rolal: then get rid of it.**

**DiStri: I tried. Chucked him off the roof, but he came back.**

**Rolal: Haha. very funny. dont throw babies.**

He wasn't joking.

**DiStri: Yeah, well he’s fine now, so we’re all good.**

**Rolal: but honestly if you dont want a kid get rid of him. legally.**

**DiStr: Fine, I’ll give him up for adoption tomorrow. Seems like a waste, I already bought a bottle and diapers.**

**Rolal: Maybe, but the kid will get a good life.**

After that, Rolal signed off. Maybe they were upset that he didn’t give them any advice.

Whatever. Dirk got up and put the still nameless baby on the couch. He was quiet again. ‘David’ he thought. Not because he wanted to, but because the adoption agency probably wanted a name for the records. And Dave was nice and simple.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> About rolal and her meteor baby

* * *

Roxy sat back and looked at Rose. she was a fine girl, and pretty too. For a baby. Still, she was a mystery. A welcome one, unknown nonetheless.

She took a sip of her drink.

Many people would say she was a bad mother. Especially since she was drinking slightly alcoholic drinks while watching a baby. But that didn't seem like much of a problem to her. Babies were like cats. You watch it, you feed it, name it, clean up after it, and importantly, make sure it's safe. And you didn't have to be extremely sober for that. Especially since babies didn't give a solitary shit one way or another.

Of course, it would be different when emotional needs came into play. But right then, Roxy could unwind.

The parenting books she had bought begged to differ, but hell, what did books know? Jack shit.

Only people knew shit. And that reasoning was what lead her to the forums of science readers. Of course, asking them had been a mistake. It only resulted in people who doubted her story and some guy who hated children.

Still, she kept hoping.

Grabbing her laptop, Roxy glanced at the baby girl. She had managed to get herself tangled in a ball of yarn kept around to distract kitties. Wll, that should be fine as long as the loops didn't get too tight.

She smiled at the baby before glancing back at her computer. It already loaded to her thread, there were a few replies, but only one was notable.

**JakeEnglish: Excuse me, But on what day did you two fellows recieve your space babies?**

Well, that was pretty straight forward.

She message him, not wanting to upset #SJB69, also known as the social justice asshole.

**Rolal: I got rosey onthe third, as for DiStri I have no idea.**

It took a while for him to respond.

**JakeEnglish: I got mine on the first.  The fellowjou mentioned got his around that time, then I believe there is a pattern.**

**Rolal: well obviously there's apattern. I'd suspect babies falling from the sky fall in a pattern. Like rain or whatevs.**

**JakeEnglish: Well, yes. But it would seem all rather mystical. Children falling from the sky in the first week of Dcember? Almost seems to spectacular to be a mere coincidence.**

Well, it did all seem rather mystical. Like wizard children!

**Rolal: okay, say these babs are majyks. What do you suggest we do?**

**JakeEnglish: Raise them?**

Well obviously. The first part of every wizard story is the first ten years of life, wizards aren't born ready.

**Rolal:Yeah**

**JakeEnglish: that and keep tabs on the children as they grow. They probably need to become friends or the likes.**

That part could wait until they were older. But keeping tabs seemed like a good idea.

Wait, shit.

DiStri was giving up his kid up for adoption today.

Andnit would be really hard to convince adopted parents that they're new kid was majykal  and fell from the sky and could possibly save some world, whether it be magical and full of wands or otherwise.

Shiiiiit.

Quickly, Roxy grabbed her other laptop and set to work find this guy.

The soft babbling of rose stopped, and Roxy look overe fearing that she strangled herself. Luckily, that wasn't the case, she just fell asleep.

smiling, Roxy took out her phone and snapped a picture. Cute.

But back to DiStri.

An hour later,she had info on him. Hisapartment in Texas, his phone. Number, and ll the info on his ID.

What a nerd.

Quickly, she texted him. 

'Dont sell your baby!'

It might not make it in time, he'll it was probably late morning where he was.

A reply came, "Wrong number,"

she snorted, 'Right number. don't you dare try to sell that babe distri.'

"Fine. Right number. How did you get it?"

'tell me if you have the baby and I'll tell you how'

"I do. Now, who the hell are you?"

'im rola, the momma of rosey'

"How'd you get my number?"

'hacked'

"Fine, don't tell me. Either way, why do you care about Dave?"

'glad to see you named him.'

"Yeah, adoption agency needs a name. He is only a couple month old."

'a couple months?'

"The thing can sit up, he must be that old."

True, Rose could sit up too.

'Dave's a cute name,'

"It doesn't matter. Why do you want to know if Dave's been put up for adoption?"

'Becasue he shouldn't be put up for adoption'

"Why?"

'it's a long story. One I don't want to type out on this shitty phone keyboard

"Listen rolal. I'm standing in front of an adoption center with a screaming kid. I'm getting stares, I don't really have a lot of time."

'kay fine. I met another guy who got a baby and in the same week we got ours. He says their connectedtwo we have to keep them connected.'

It took him a while. "What?"

Her thumbs hurt a little now, 'we have to keep the babies!'

"Fine"

She sighed. Disaster avoided.

"I'll keep him, only for today."

At least for now. At least he was being reasonable.

'thnx'

She put her phone down and shifted the laptops to the side. She then picked up the still soundly sleeping Rosey and walked to her room upstairs. She'd probably be more comfortable in her crib.

"Man, these babies." She thought aloud.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. I'm babysitting for twelve hours. I have nothing to do. So have several shatters that I wrote in school but haven't uploaded.this took forever to transcribe for absolutely no reason.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Still bored, dirk has a baby, swindles money,

Dirk turned around and walked away. 

Dave's screams didn't stop, he was just really fussy that day for reasons Dirk didn't understand.

Aothere think the blond didn't understand was why he was keeping the little thing. He was loud and annoying and he couldn't afford him. Not to mention it would only get worse as he got older.

But, rolal insisted. Whoever rolal was. He'd have to get a formal name later.

Rght now, he'd have to get home and figure out exactly what was bugging Dave, as the baby was now officially called.

He got home in me piece, though Dave was still screaming. He grabbed a bottle and filled it with juice, one of the only kid drinks he had. He popped it in his mouth, effectively shutting him up.

He say down at the computer while Dave was busy suckling on the couch.

After a few minutes of searching, he found a list of reasons a Kid his age would be crying.

Teething was at the top of the list. Hewot up and checked the kids mouth. Yep, a tooth was poking out of the ink weird gummy mouth of his.

Damn, he'd have to get a teething ring or someone.

Ugh. Kids were so expensive.

Sighing, he noticed he had a message. Probably from rolal.

Indeed it was.

**Rolal: So as I was sayin jake, the other guy who has a baby suggests that three babies fell all in the same week is because of some magical reason. Probs.**

That was ridiculous. And it cleared absolutely nothing up.

**DiStri: That's ridiculous. magical babies?**

**Rolal: these babs fell on fucking comets and your sayin its ridiculous that these space children don't have the possibility of being related to otherworldly shit fuckery is stupid?**

**DiStri, that's exactly what I'm saying.**

**Rolal: Was that a joke?**

**DiStri: The second one was.**

**DiStr:Wait, was that sarcasm?**

**Rolal: hmm:/**

**DiStri: Whatevere. magical or not, I can't afford Dave.**

**Rolal: I don't care. I say you have to keep him.**

**DiStri: he'll have a really shitty life considering I can the bare minimum right now, for mysel. And I can't get a job conspidering I have to watch him.**

**Rolal: just ask your parents for money.**

**DiStri: Sorry to tell you this honey, but as far as parents go, mine don't think I exist.**

**Rolal: ...**

**DiStri: Life isn't as perfect for me as it is for you. So if you want me to keep the thing, you'll help me out.**

**Rolal: how can I help you if I'm in new York and you're jn Texas.**

**DiStri: How do you know where I live?**

**Rolal: mad hacking skillz**

**DiStri: What, are you twelve?**

**Rolal: yes, a twelve year old takin care of a baby.**

**DiStri: Even if you were twelve, you cold still give me financial support.**

**Rolal: what makes you say that?**

**DiStri: Well, we're contacting eachother through a site dedicated to Roxy Lalondes science and your user name is Rolal, so even if I'm wrong about you snooping on your own site, you don't seem all that concerned about your fjnances despite youadditional having a baby, which is a huge expense. Especially if you have to get everything at once.**

**Rolal: hmm, your pretty smart. Why don't you have a better job?**

**DiStri: Because I didn't graduate highschool, I've been arrested, and I'm unpleasant.**

**Rolal: oh, I know the last part all too well.**

**DiStri: Hardee har har. Just send me money.**

**Rolal: now why wold I do something like that?**

**DiStri: Oh sorry, I was under the assumption that you wanted me to keep this brat. Guess I'll go back to the adoption agency.**

**Rolal: you manipulative, you know that right?**

**DiStri: so you have my address, right?**

**Rolal: yeah.**

Dave finished his bottle and chucked it at Dirks head. The older blond promptly turned around and glared, "Piece of shit"

**Author's Note:**

> IDK, I'm pretty damn sure most of this is canon. I'm not looking shit up, I'm just remembering it. I have a hella memory, but, if I'm wrong please correct me, but provide evidence. BEcause whle some of this may be my interpretation and my filling in of lines, what you say could be also, and I ain't about to listen to some ho dad bad mouth my ideas just because theirs are different. Aight?


End file.
